Who's Jealous Now?

So much for keeping up with this blog as I'd hoped. My bad. Zaki and I went on our first vacation in about 15 years (yes, that's longer than we've been together) and discovered paradise in Hawaii. That pretty much ruled. And ever since returning I feel like I've been running at full speed to catch up. But today Mother Nature gave me a snow day from work and I know that if I don't update my blog, Emi may never forgive me. So here it is.

I could write about Hawaii, but I don't want to make anyone jealous.

Oh, who am I kidding? I want to make everyone jealous! That's why I'm sending photo Christmas cards this year with a prominently displayed picture of us in front of a beach sunset. I haven't sent out physical cards in a few years, but I had to make an exception this year. I'm always hearing about other people's vacations and fun and dammit, I don't know when I'll get another one so I'm taking the full brag potential this time around. But if you don't get one of these cards, don't feel too bad. I went for the expensive option (like I said, I don't know when I'll get another chance) so I only ordered a limited number. But if you'd still like to feel jealous of me, check this out:

That's right - we're pirates. And I'm holding a bird in my hand. And that bird is saying "Hey Boss!" It was as awesome as you think it is.

Anyhoo, Hawaii was amazing, nuff said.

When I got back to the real world, I found myself organizing a surprise baby shower with about a week and a half notice. Not to toot my own horn, but it ruled. I am a great party planner, at least when I want to be. The new mama was totally surprised and called it the best party she's ever been to. And unlike some people I know, she's not the type to lie about that. I think. Regardless, it ruled and I'm proud of it.

Unfortunately, right about the same time as I was planning this party at my little condo, I was dealing with a feud with my cat. For those of you who haven't met my cat, let me tell you a little bit about him. His name is Moby. He comes from a Jerry Springer home and is very lucky to live where he is. His name came to him cuz we thought it sounded good and fit him. However, turns out it is two-fold, cuz he's a dick. We love him, but he's a dick. Another nickname we have for him is Jack. As in Ass. He's totally snuggly and loveable one minute and the next he's a monumental pain in the buttocks. You may be saying "Uh, yeah, sounds like a cat." Don't sass me. I've had cats my entire life. No one is more familiar with feline behavior than I am. But this cat is a jerk. I love him but he's a jerk. Case in point:

When we got back from Hawaii, Moby was pissed. Not cuz we were back but because we had been gone in the first place. We didn't have anyone staying overnight with him this time so he only had visitors a time or two each day. So he was mad at being lonely. He was also (understandably) mad that his box wasn't cleaned in its usual timely manner. So we returned to a bunch of litter that was kicked out of his box and had been tracked all over the house. I promptly vacuumed (sorry neighbors, since this was at 10:30pm) and assumed no further problems would ensue. Wrong.

Long story short, Moby has now taken to obsessively pawing at the side of his litter box, the floor around the box, anything that happens to be around his box and most problematically, the floor of the litter box. He kicks it out and then proceeds to track it around the place. We thought maybe he wanted all new litter - no change. We thought maybe he wanted a new box - still he shows his OCD. Would a new box with a flap door slow him down a bit? Sure wouldn't. So there is a constant argument between Moby and (mostly) Z about how Mobes needs to stop being a jackass. We're here for crying out loud. Moby's not having it. We've made an appointment with the vet to make sure that there isn't anything more serious going on, but given the fact that he continues to use his box successfully in addition to the 97 times an hour he goes in just to kick litter around, I don't think he's sick. If nothing else, maybe our vet can suggest some way to calm him down.

And then we're leaving for Boise as soon as we get word that my sister-in-law is going into labor. So even if we find a solution, we're just going to psychologically damage him more in a week or two. Good times.

How did I start this? Oh yeah, so I'm trying to prepare my 690 square foot condo for a lovely baby shower, but I've got cat litter constantly under foot. And did I mention that my vacuum cleaner is crap? I would say it sucks, but that's the problem - it doesn't. So I'm running around the place, rolling the dustbuster all over the floor, trying to clean. It was a good time. Fortunately, once people started showing up for the party, Moby freaked out and hit in the box spring, as he is wont to do. So no more litter. Until everyone left, that is.

Suggestions? Anyone? Seriously, it's not fun. Earlier today Z told Moby to come over and fight like a man by wrestling him. I'm not honestly sure who would win that battle, but I'm inclined to put my money on the cat. I mean, just look at his crazy eyes:

Cra-a-a-zay (Think Gnarls Barkley)

I was driving down the street the other day to pick Zaki up from work. I pulled up to a stop light just about the time 2 bicyclists were pulling up in the bike lane beside me. I then see a pedestrian crossing in the crosswalk in front of me - he looks like he may be homeless but perhaps he is just not all that interested in hygiene - hard to say. Anyway, I notice that he's walking rather slowly and has his arm fully extended in the air and is looking in my direction. And he's flipping me off. Or he's flipping the bikers off. Or he's flipping off the fact that he has to cross the street. Or he's just flipping off everything and everybody. I have no idea. It didn't seem particularly aimed at me or at the bikers, but it could have been. None of us did anything obviously wrong - no one had to slam on their breaks, no one threw their garbage at him, there were no apparent infractions of the vehicle/pedestrian or biker/pedestrian code. I glanced at the bikers to see if they seemed to recognize him but the bikers and I just continued to act as though this wasn't happening. Because he was obviously crazy.

But was he? Sometimes I wonder if, like cats, "crazy" people are able to see and hear things that we don't. Real things (I swear cats have a reason for darting around the house like they're chasing something even though we can't see it). What if they're right and the rest of us "sane" ones are wrong? I suppose this just makes me sound crazy, too. But who's to say Long-Haired-Bird-Wagging Dude didn't have a perfectly viable reason for his actions? And he was wondering why we weren't all acting accordingly.

Or not.

Yes We Did

It turns out blogging is harder than I thought it would be. I guess maybe I just had some funny stories to tell when I first started this thing and ever since I keep thinking I'll update when something else interesting happens. But nothing has. To me I mean. But there have been so many huge things that have happened in the world lately that I figure I'll just write about them.

In case you hadn't heard, the next president of the United States is BARACK OBAMA!!!!! There really aren't words for how happy this makes me. I am still occasionally overcome with joy (manifested in tears and/or squeals) when I think about it. I saw his first press conference yesterday and I went nuts - that's our Commander in Chief!!! Zaki laughed at me because my glee was so seemingly-random and I couldn't control it. But he's just what a prez is supposed to look like and sound like - smart, in control, smooth. I love him so much. And did you happen to see that video of him walking out of some building the other day wearing a baseball cap, jeans and sneakers? President Bad Ass! Taking the reigns from our current President Dumb Ass. The night after the election I had a dream that I ran into Obizzle walking down the street and I just went up to him and threw my arms around him and told him how much I love him and how wonderful he is. He was very, very gracious and hugged me right back. Part of me would like to think it would go like that if I ever met him. But he's got all that secret service around him so it probably wouldn't be as pretty as my dream. Besides, if the way I act around David Sedaris is any indication, I'd probably just freeze and say a few incoherent words before smiling and walking away embarrassed.

I've got a cold now. I used to get a cold every Christmas break or after every play I did. I haven't done any shows lately and I'm not in school so I'm thinking this is a post-election cold. I really did sleep as though a huge weight was lifted off of me after the election. Is that crazy? I wasn't the one running and aside from the money I donated and the countless conversations I've had about his awesomeness over the last year I wasn't working on the campaign. But I felt like my future and the future of my soon-to-be-born nephew and the kids I want to have some day was at stake. When Kerry lost 4 years ago I had a major meltdown the night after election day. Ask Zaki - it was messy. I was sure that W would run this country and possibly the planet into the ground and I couldn't in good conscience bring a child into the world with him in office. Of course I wasn't planning to have a kid during that time, but it was a matter of principle. But now, even though he did manage to largely run us into the ground, we've got a prez who can and will lift us up. So I guess now I've got no excuse not to start popping out the kids.

This is a lot of rambling so I should probably wrap it up. For anyone who is still reading, my apologies for any incoherence. Perhaps I will post another update before 6 months goes by...

And Now For Something Completely Different

I'm taking a break from my usual humor-laced blog today. I'll try not to get too deep...

Last night's speech by Barack Obama moved me so much that my eyes keep welling up a day later as I think about it. Then this morning's announcement that McCain chose a woman as his running mate started to make me a bit nervous - will women vote for McCain now just because he's got a woman on the ticket, regardless of the fact that she is not an advocate for women's issues? Obviously that's the idea and it made me unsettled. Then I suddenly remembered something from "The Secret" that really hit me at the time but I had sort of forgotten about until now. It mentions how people who rally against causes are frequently not successful. This is because of the nature of attraction – rallying against something just brings up more of the negative feelings and they keep coming back. This may be why Kerry didn’t win in 2004 – people weren’t voting FOR him as much as they were voting AGAINST Bush.

This year is different. We aren’t just voting AGAINST McCain and the last 8 years – though that’s certainly part of it. But this time we’re voting FOR Barack and FOR the hope he brings with him.

My officemate is a die-hard Democrat who had been leaning toward Hillary but would vote for whoever the Dem candidate ended up being. She saw Hillary’s speech on Tuesday and was moved enough to volunteer for the Obama campaign. And she went to an Obama houseparty last night, with a whole bunch of people she didn’t know and was totally out of her comfort zone but felt moved to do it. And after hearing his speech (and crying off-and-on throughout) she said she is no longer just behind him because he is the Democratic nominee, she is now behind him because of WHO HE IS.

Amazing.

We’re gonna win this time.

Wii Wii Wii Wii Wii All The Way Home

Has your spouse ever bought something that you know you should be upset that he or she bought, but because you like it, you aren’t as upset as you ought to be?

Z has been whining about wanting a Wii forever. But it’s really picked up intensity for some reason over the last week. I want one, too, but I know we should not be putting more stuff on our credit cards. He knows this, too, but it doesn’t stop him from whining about it.

Well he decided today, without telling me first (he knows I would’ve talked him out of it again), that he’d go to GameStop at Westlake during his lunch hour and if they had one in stock, he was gonna buy it cuz it would be fate or something. He asked and the girl said they were out. Then she said “Wait, lemme check again.” Turns out they had 1 left.

So he bought it.

Turd.

Yet I can’t wait to play it.

He informed me by sending an email that simply said “Where did this come from?” and an attached picture of himself holding the box and looking confused. Goofball. He told his co-worker that took the shot that this would be the first time he’d sent me a picture that would make me simultaneously pissed and excited.

He was correct.

Bussin' It

Normally, Z picks me up after work and we carpool home together. But occasionally something comes up and I have to find my own way home. As I got over my fear of getting lost on public transportation when we lived in NYC, I'm not afraid to take the bus home. However, I have never liked taking routes that require me to get off of one bus and transfer to another. When given the option, I'll almost always choose the route that may take a bit longer but lets me sit my butt in a seat for the entire time. I can read and not have to worry about missing my transfer spot or not being able to find the next bus, etc.

Well I guess I was feeling like I needed to shake stuff up a bit yesterday, and I went way out on the edge and decided to try a new route home. The route that I normally would have taken would've dropped me off about 1/4 of a mile to the west of our condo. But I wanted to take advantage of my husband-free time and stop at the drugstore for a few things first (little-known-fact about Devin: I love drugstores. I love browsing and looking at all the odds-and-ends that I don't need but would probably enjoy, such as new makeup, gadgets, etc. I love taking my time to pick out the perfect birthday card. I love it all. Not surprisingly, Z does not find this same joy in drugstores. But we typically end up stopping there on our way home from work. Together. Thus, when given the opportunity, I will take my time and peruse the goods without an impatient Z chomping at the bit to leave). But the drugstore is about 1/4 mile to the West of our condo. Anyone who knows me, knows that I'm lazy. So I faced a difficult choice: take a bus route that requires the energy necessary to make a transfer and get dropped off right by the drugstore OR take the longer route home with no transfers and walk 1/2 mile to the drugstore, and then back home 1/4 mile afterward. It was a tough call, but I went with the bus transfer. (Brief note: I would just like to point out how much energy I spend figuring out how to best be lazy. It makes no sense, I know).

So I get on the bus at its final stop downtown with no problem. I even scored a seat in the back of the full bus - wedged between 2 large guys, but a seat is a seat. My transfer location is listed as being located on a ramp off I-5. I assume that, since this ramp is located at a pretty busy intersection, it will be a heavily used transfer stop. Wrong. I notice that we get on the ramp and no one has yet pulled the "Stop Requested" rope yet. "Maybe it is just so popular that it stops there automatically" I think to myself. I can tell we're getting close and am noticing no signs of slowing down. I figure I may as well pull the rope, just in case. I do this just in time, as I am apparently the only one on the bus who wants to stop here. So I awkwardly maneuver myself and my backpack and my purse and my ipod through the crowded bus, trying hard not to step on anyone in the process, all the while trying not to feel as self-conscious as I do, being the only person moving on the bus. After fumbling with my bus pass for a second, I make it out the door and the bus continues on.

I notice a stairway that leads up off the freeway and onto the intersection where my next bus stop is to be located. Looking back on this I assume that if I'd glanced around myself for 2 seconds before heading up the stairs, I might have found a pathway that would have taken me under the street overhead and shown me to the stairway that would lead directly to the next bus stop on the opposite side of the street. I assume this, because once I get up to the intersection, the only way to cross is to go in a U-shape - East across 5th, North across 145th, and back West across 5th again. Ugh. Did I mention that I'm lazy? Fortunately I've got about 8 minutes until my next bus is due to pick me up.

I make it over with a few minutes to spare and I decide to have a seat inside the little bench shelter. I am the only person there, but on one of the benches there is an unopened package of vacuum cleaner bags and a nearly-full styrofoam cup of what looks like it might have been an orange milkshake in the not-too-distant past. The abandonment of these items puzzles me. First off, I'm a huge milkshake fan. I can imagine few instances when I would take off and leave a nearly full cup of ice cream goodness to go to waste. Second, I recall only one occasion in my adult life where I had to buy vacuum cleaner bags and I seem to remember it wasn't just something I picked up on a whim at Albertson's - I had to really know what I was looking for. And even then I think I got the wrong thing. I remember accompanying my parents to the vacuum store as a kid to get bags. It was a specific trip. You can't buy those things just anywhere. So I'm thinking whoever left those bags there must have had a pretty compelling reason to leave them behind. Again, it may be my laziness talking, but if you're going to go to the trouble to find vacuum cleaner bags once, you probably aren't going to want to do it again in the immediate future.

So I sit and ponder this some more and look forward to my trip to Walgreen's. I glance down at my watch and it's almost 4:00. The bus is to arrive at 4:03. I look around and notice the bus at the intersection, getting ready to turn toward me. I step out of the shelter and wait, watching the bus drive closer. And closer. And closer. And past me.

I stop and think for a moment - should I run after it? Could I possibly make it in time before the light at the intersection a block away, where it is currently stopped, changes? There's no way, given all the crap I'm carrying. I then think perhaps I've realized the motivation behind the abandonment of the vacuum bags and the milkshake and I briefly laugh to myself as I envision the poor sap, so desperate to get home that he leaves his very specific purchase and his delicious treat, running down the street after the bus. But my mind quickly gets back to my own predicament: What the hell?! I looked right at the bus driver and he didn't even look at the stop. Did I do something wrong? Was I supposed to be jumping around, flagging him down? Is he a jackass or simply an idiot? Or maybe this is his first day on the route and he just made a mistake and I should give him a break. Screw that! And why did no one else on the bus tell him I was there - surely someone had to see me and my bewildered expression, waiting outside that shelter. Son of a! I stopped to breathe for a moment and considered my options. It was, according to my watch, only 4pm. Maybe this was not my bus, as it wasn't due until 4:03. Maybe this was the earlier bus, making up some other missed stops or something, and my expected 4:03 would be here momentarily. I'd give it until 4:10.

Well of course no other bus showed up. The schedule listed at the shelter indicated that the next bus wouldn't be due for 1/2 hour. And of course this was the only bus that travels down this street. So I again had 2 options: I could sit at the stop for 1/2 hour and HOPE that the next time around the bus would stop. Or I could suck it up and start hoofin' it. You may be surprised to learn, given the laziness I have mentioned, that I actually sucked it up and started walkin'.

It's not a huge walk - it's probably about 3/4 of a mile. I imagine I walked more than this regularly when I was in NYC. But most of the streets are flat in NYC. And even though I drive this road all the time, I had never noticed that it is largely a series of inclines. So this is automatically a tougher walk. Also, I had not mentally prepared for it. I need to be psyched up for physical exercise. And yes, the weather was fortunately quite nice and sunny. However, I have been cursed with a sweat response equal only to that of Ruben Studdard and I started dripping about 3 steps into the hike. So it goes without saying that I was irritated with my situation.

I finally arrived at the drugstore about 1/2 hour later, totally sweaty. Suddenly my list of reasons for wanting to hang out at Walgreen's increased as I couldn't wait to lounge in the air conditioning for a while before heading back out for the last 1/2 mile walk home. So I took full advantage, found just the right cards, enjoyed not being rushed, and finally headed home.

To recap, I would've been further ahead to take the bus route that would have dropped me off 1/4 of a mile away from the condo. Walking from there to the drugstore and back home would've been about 3/4 of a mile total, if that. Instead, I took the bus with the transfer and ended up walking just over a mile. So much for being lazy.

But at least I could more easily justify eating the candy I bought at Walgreen's.

As I stopped at the mailbox to pick up our mail, I was greeted by my very favorite, happiest sign of the late summer - the new Ikea catalog. As though recognizing that it owed me something, the universe got back on my good side.

Hope for the Future...of Reality TV

2008 is proving to be something of a defining moment for me and my reality competition TV shows. First, my preference to be Bret Michaels' Rock of Love, Ambre (the one who seemed destined for runner-up as she was so much less nasty - and thus, seemingly less appealing to Bret - than Daisy) actually won his heart, if only for long enough to get him some "hot monkey sex" (his words, not mine). Then, in the pinnacle of reality competitions, my choice (okay, full disclosure: my obsession) to win American Idol ACTUALLY won the show. And as if I could realistically ask for more, my favorite Top Chef contestant won not only the competition, but went on to win Fan Favorite, too! The tides have turned, the mood has changed and I'm starting to get excited about the possibilities for greatness. Perhaps it's the political atmosphere in this country, but I can't help feeling that there really is hope for a better crop of Reality Show winners. And isn't that what "a better tomorrow" is really all about, after all?

It's not just the winners that are improving. It's the runners-up, too. It's like judges (and producers, because let's be honest – they have a lot to do with the results no matter how much they may deny it) and the voting public has finally caught on to my long-held beliefs on judging standards:
1. If the show is trashy (such as "Rock of Love"), the final two should be comprised of the one winner we all know the host should choose and the one runner-up that is the most entertaining, controversial, trashy and hilarious, that you actually start to think might win it all. The longer he/she is in the competition, the longer we'll watch. Just don't let him/her win. We may love the theatrics, but ultimately, we trashy-show viewers are romantics at heart and want a fairy tale ending – hot monkey sex not withstanding.
2. If the show is a singing competition, get rid of the guy(s) and/or girl(s) I dislike the most right away. If you're not sure who that is, give me a call. I'm tired of enduring weeks and weeks of uninteresting performances by people I find boring/annoying/free of personality/egotistical. And while I could stop watching the show until they have been kicked off, it seems unfair to ask me to miss out on all of the performers who don't bother me. It would just be better to ask me who should get the boot. No one else need be consulted. If only I could get back those minutes of my life back where I had to sit through Syesha Mercado and Scott Savol performances. I could've had a V-8. But if there is one contestant that is clearly far-and-away better (and hotter) than the competition, and another that is a big draw for the tween vote AND can sing AND doesn't drive me nuts, I can appreciate the need for this demographic and I won't begrudge the advertisers, so the youth-vote can be allowed to keep their heartthrob in the competition until the finale. As long as the hot rocker wins it all.
3. Similar to the singing competition rules above, if there is a cooking show that has multiple unlikable contestants and a few obviously superior contestants, go ahead and let the judges keep ONE of the annoying contestants around for the finale, as the drama he or she will create will keep fair-weather watchers coming back. Even lead him or her to believe he or she will win it all. Just make sure one of the obviously deserving, non-irritating contestants wins. If unsure who falls into which category, again, I am happy to provide this information. Just give me a call. If these standards are followed, at the very minimum as loose guidelines, we can be assured of not only the best winners, but the best runners-up. And we all know what that could potentially mean: A better crop of people to star in upcoming "CelebReality" competitions on VH1! Who wouldn't watch "The Surreal Life: Season 14" starring Daisy, David Archuleta and Lisa?!

Thank you, Reality TV. It's been a long time coming. I am hopeful for the future as I have now seen that it really is possible for the best choice to win and that I don't always have to be disappointed in a reality competition's outcome. It seems that, finally, voters and judges have seen the light and, maybe psychically, have realized whose opinions should've been considered more carefully all along: Mine.

Just a Typical Friday Night

Apparently, the universe decided I needed to cash in a bunch of my good fortune chips on Friday, May 23rd. Not only did I learn that night that I am going to be an Aunt for the first time, but I also learned that I actually won a contest. A local radio station sends out a newsletter of sorts once a week that usually includes a contest or two. I have entered probably 90% of these contests (usually for concert tickets) over the past 4 years and have never won a thing. I was starting to think I never would but never gave it much thought. But I kept on trying. And whaddaya know but I actually won 2 tickets to see BJ Novak's stand-up comedy show AND attend a meet-and-greet with him afterward. As a HUGE fan of The Office, and as someone easily starstruck, this was incredibly exciting for me. I had one week to come up with something semi-intelligent (or at least not humiliating) to say to him. I finally opted to just play it by ear and hopefully remind myself that he is just a regular guy - no need to be starstruck, right? I like the guy, but he's not one of my heroes or anything. Surely I'd be less tongue-tied and awkward than I am every time I meet David Sedaris (which embarrasses me every time I think of it. We WILL be best friends someday. If I can get past the paralysis I develop each time we meet.).

Anyway, Friday night May 30th finally rolls around. There were 2 opening acts before he came on. The first guy did a hilarious “performance art” piece to the theme of Saved By The Bell and then proceeded to get heckled by the horrible people in the audience. One of the worst was sitting directly behind us. I felt so bad for the comedian. His comedy is the kind that's more bizarre and weird and I think people just didn’t get it. I liked him okay but I felt awful for him, though I’m sure he’s used to it. What is it about people in the audiences at comedy shows? It’s like it’s okay to make an ass out of themselves cuz they think they’re hilarious. But they aren’t. Anyway, that was pretty disappointing. The next guy came out and I’ve actually seen him on Comedy Central or Conan or something, cuz he’s familiar. Dan Mintz is his name, look him up. He gets heckled far less than the first guy and is really funny.

Finally, BJ came out. He’s hysterical! I really didn’t know what to expect, but he put on a really great set! And he even had a bit about how pandas are the cutest animals in the world [Background: the sight of baby pandas makes me cry. Happy cry. Every. Single. Time.] and I couldn’t help but think how funny my friends would all find that, knowing I was in the crowd, probably crying just thinking about it (I didn’t, by the way). And another bit about pregnancy tests sold at the dollar store which was funny cuz my newly-pregnant sister-in-law apparently used this method to discover she was pregnant. BJ had some hecklers, too, but they weren’t making fun of him – they were just trying to star in their own show, I guess. But he handled it so perfectly by making fun of the bad ones and embarrassing the people. And there was one guy who said, early on, “You’re awesome!” so he dubbed him “You’re Awesome Guy” for the rest of the show and called on him to back him up throughout the show. Anyway, he was great and I was really impressed. Oh, and hot. He was really hot.

The show ends and we make our way to the right side of the stage as instructed. I see a girl, Amy, that I’ve met at a few parties our friends Andrew and Michelle have had and it turns out her husband, Brad, is the guy who is to lead us to the meet-and-greet spot, so she got to join him. So it was cool to have a “friend” there, too. There were probably about 10 of us and they led us downstairs to a sort of backstage area. We all just sort of lined up in this hallway and then BJ walked in and was like “Hi! So, uh, who is everybody?” Brad explains what radio stations we’re from and they decide BJ will just stand in a spot and we can go up and have our pictures taken with him and chat on our way out.

(Sidebar: I decided not to take my camera with me in case they checked our bags. Zaki’s new Blackberry has a nice camera in it, so I opted to use that if we were allowed. Last weekend at the Pacific Science Center it took him forever to remember how to use the camera feature. I feared this might happen again. He said he knew how to do it. I didn’t want to nag, so I let it go. But I was worried.)

Skip back to the point where we hear the plan of the meet-and-greet. Z takes out his phone and, lo and behold, has no idea how to use the camera. So the first girl, Amy, gets her pic taken and then we’re up next. Brad says, “You guys want a picture?” and I say (trying not to sound as irritated as I am, particularly since Z was about to give up on the idea before I told him to keep trying) “Well, he can’t figure out the camera on his phone.” To which BJ then replies “That’s the exact same phone I have. Want me to try?” So Z hands him the phone and he promptly figures it out (I figured it out later, too. Insanely easy. Whatever.). So I then move over to stand in position and BJ sort of puts his arm up in the air as if to get in position to put his arm around my shoulder for the pic. I misread this and take it to be him offering a hug, so I take him up on it. Ladies (and gay fellas), can ya blame me? He gives me sort of a half-hug and I try not to be as embarrassed as I kind of am. Z gets in position on the other side of him and Brad goes to take the pic. But he’s not sure how to work the zoom. Of course, Z isn’t either, so BJ helps him out there, too. Then we get our pic taken, tell him we’re big fans, and then move on.

That’s it.

I went to say goodbye to Amy and as I’m doing this Z strikes up a conversation with the 2nd comedian, Dan, that opened for BJ. I then join them and we give him some recommendations of places to see while he’s in town for the next day. He’s really nice. Then everyone has had their pic taken and BJ is walking away and they call Dan over and everyone in BJ’s group looks back at us and we all say goodbye.

So that was that. And to top it all off, as we’re walking back to the car a homeless, drunk man tells Zaki “that’s a great piece of ass you’ve got on that woman.” So I was, of course, flattered. Z didn’t hear what he said and when I told him and he responded “Yup, sure is” I said, “Thanks for defending my honor, Honey.” And he said he’d kick the guy’s ass if I wanted him too, which obviously I didn’t.

Like I said, I was flattered.

That was my Friday night.